Tenchi Slays the demons and finds his man hood
by akito
Summary: tenchi gets transported to a magical land where many stupid things happen to him. watch as i use my skills to produce a stupid yet funny fic for all to enjoy. Well not really for all to enjoy. But oh well


Tenchi Slays the demons and finds his man hood

A story By akito

A rant: I like to write screwed up deplorable stories. Its true. Unfortunately All my stores were deleted thanks to Hitler.net I mean Fanfiction.net. I guess free speech is meaningless now a days. So lets all conform and be good little Girls and boys.. WELL I WONT!

This story is messed up and disturbing keep in mind im not trying to insult you im just crazy is all. No offence really. Plz don't be offended. Oh your gonna be Offended? WELL SCREW YOU! ILL SHOW YOU SOMETHING! YEAH SOMETHING HARD AND FULL OF STICKY STUFF! Oh wait calm down plz don't pay attention to that. Its My little brother FukoMeLotta who says that. Really it is?

Anyway on with the fic. Also it will be filled with spelling and grammar errors cuz it makes the story cooler. Ok on really im just lazy.

Tenchi was one walking one day Down a hill toward his home when suddenly a garden Gnome appeared.

"HELLO! I am the Great Gnome Of Ballzak. I must transfer you to the magical world now" said the gnome.

And with those words a bright light absorbed tenchi and he awakened in a land of mystical fairies. 

Tenchi looked around and said. "wow for an akito Story this is kinda tame. I like it."

But just then The Ground Opened up and out popped.

Out Popped.

…….

……

THE MAGICAL GIRL PRETTY NOBOYUKI.

Noboyuki hopped out Wearing his signature Pink Tutu and screamed.

"HERE BE DRAGONS! Come Tenchi You Must Ride My dragon To find the Maiden Of Virtue."

Know there was no arguing with MGP (magical Girl Pretty Noboyuki) he Jumped aboard Noboyuki's Large "dragon" that came out of Noboyuki's pants. And with a squish and a squirt they were off..

About an hour later they landed in a clearing next to a forest.

"HAHAHAHAHA TENCHI." Noboyuki said. "You may want to save the maiden But you must find your man hood to slay the demons."

"my man hood?" tenchi said "I must find it"

Noboyuki then said proudly. "I cannot Find it. Im off to the micheal Jackson show to molest me some young boys."

And with that Noboyuki Flew away.

Tenchi ventured into the forest when suddenly I lovely Pixie came running at him. That pixie was sasami.

Sasami "Hello I am the Magical Pixie of Flatulence. Pleased to meat you,:

And with those words Sasami Bent Over and let a massive Chunk blowing fart out of her ass at tenchi. 

When the feces and gas cleared tenchi saw that sasami had disappeared But down on the Ground was a small egg. With a clicking sound the egg hatched revealing RYO OHKI.

Tenhchi "Oh RYO OHKI IM SO GLAD TO SEE YOU!"

And with those words said tenchi did the only thing he ever wanted to do in such a situation. He Shoved Ryo OHKI UP HIS ASS. With a meow and some grunts from tenchi the deed was done and tenchi continued on his way., after a day or two he arrived at a small town. Not knowing what else to do tenchi entered the local pub where he saw Mihsohi and Kiyone.

"Mihoshi Kiyone im So glad to see you." tenchi said

Mihoshi "WHERE BE MY CRAB LEGS."

Kiyone "Shut up about Your Crab legs you stupid slut."

Mihoshi "Mihoshi Not Slut. Mihoshi Ogre."

Tenchi noted that mihoshi seemed smarter then usual..

Kiyone waved mihoshi off and said. "Please help us tenchi we must catch the pirate."

Tenchi thinking of nothing better to do Suddenly pulled out a bat and beat the tar out of mihoshi. Leaving her for dead.

Kiyone and tenchi reached the pirate ship in record time. (yeah some one was recording it. Just Shut up!)

Kiyone and tenchi boarded the ship and began to fight 111111111113333333333333222234454354362345235235234234 1241241241241234124 and a half pirates.

But just as tenchi thought the battle would be too hard Kiyone proved her worth by sleeping with all the pirated one by one and some times two by two. Much squirting of man juices and moaning commenced.

After kiyone slept with all the pirates tenchi looked ather withered and man member soaked body. Since kiyone served her purpose he tossed her into a wood chipper laughing as her body gets ground up. (yeah tenchi is sadist For some reason. Don't ask me why Its not like I Wrote this. Oh wait I did. Now I feel shame)

Tenchi entered The captains Cabin to reveal Ryoko.

He was so happy to see Ryoko that they both decided to have sex on the spot. But as soon as tenchi tried to enter ryoko with his small man ham. She said 

"No tenchi you cannot enter me. You must find your man hood."

And so tenchi left

After many things such as crossing bridges, Selling Children Into slavery and Burning down a city tenchi finally reached where the princess was being held by the demon. That princess was none other then ayeka who at the moment was being bound by a weird tentacle type thing.

"tenchi Go into the cave to slay the demon." said ayeka

So being an obedient little Pussy Boy he entered the cave.

And Out came Yosho All Naked and Oiled Up.

"please slay me." Begged yosho

Well needless to say that was all tenchi needed to hear. He quickly crapped out Ryo ohki From his ass and made the cabbit bite his left nut off. This of course was the key to his Man hood and quickly his once small cock became huge.

That said Tenchi and yosho made sweet love for 14days and 14 nites untill yosho finally died.

YAY Ayeka was saved. But tenchi didn't really care. He just threw her into the wood chipper and went back to ryoko.

But sadly when he met Ryoko once again. He learned that she was actually a man. This disgusted tenchi as he was only attracted to old men Not young men. So with a bit of sadness tenchi walked off into the sunset.

EPILOGE 

Tenchi arrived at a small villege called "OLD MANVILLE" the village was nothing but old men. Not one man under 80 was their. Well this was paradise too tenchi and needless to say he spent the rest of his life giving sponge baths, greasing old men up and being a tool for their wrinkly old "Man Wands" 

And all Lived happily ever after.. Except sasami she was captured by cannibals and burned alive at the steak. And if your wondering what happened to Ryoko. Well she found ryo-ohki and had many good times with the small cabbit untill ryo ohki turned on her and killed her in a motorcycle accident.

THE END

The Moral of this story is with A beetle. A condom and Jesus all problems can be solved


End file.
